As the "big day" approaches I can't help but have worry. Everyone says I am supposed to enjoy this time because it will be the only time...blah blah blah. I just can't help but feel incredibly emotional and stressed. I can't find a trace of enjoyment right now. Now, I completely enjoyed my parties and showers and I must admit I enjoy getting gifts, but all the other things that come along with planning a wedding are not enjoyable to me. Right now, I just want to snap my fingers and it be here. I think the next ten days are going to be the longest EVER! Minus the fact that I still have things to do. I still do not have transportation worked out, including how we are "leaving" the reception. I also dont have the programs started. We came frighteningly close to not having flowers either, but thats a whole other blog.
I have learned that I have irrational fears about this day. My first fear is that we are going to go over capacity that the chapel and barn will hold. I have known how many each would hold from day one which is why I opted to have a "small wedding". Turns out, its really not going to be so small. What if no one can dance b/c there simply isn't room? My second irrational fear is that Brent or myself will get sick. I dont mean, a cold or cough, but some illness that will prevent us from getting up that day. Isn't that crazy?? I need major prayer people. This is the devil.
I guess if you can add some calming words that would be great. I know "it will turn out wonderful" and "at the end of the day you will still be married" and those are really nice thoughts, but that just doesnt seem to ease my stress. I guess I just have to see for myself. Poor Brent and my mother have to catch the brunt of it all. SORRY! It will be here soon.
